A Golf Resolution

I’m admittedly not much for new year’s resolutions. That’s not to say they aren’t worth doing. On the contrary, resolutions require honest self-reflection which I think is an honorable exercise. The more impressive act is the continual practice of those commitments.

While resolutions are mainly for personal, large-as-life matters, I thought it beneficial to spotlight golf. I actually have a particular resolution in mind. It doesn’t have anything to do with your stat line or work ethic. Those topics aren’t even applicable to every golfer. Golfers who play for fun hardly worry about greens in regulation. This resolution is a primary component to the mental curriculum that I offer clients. Even if playing for fun, this ought to remain a guiding principle.

The resolution is this: Think of yourself as a player you coach.

There is a default mentality of negative thinking. Years ago, a few psychologists’ research provided evidence of a negative bias within human thinking. Negative bias is the tendency to ponder and/or be swayed by negative experiences more than positive ones — even if the positives outweigh the negatives.

From news to sports, this pervades throughout different environments and affects people differently. A bad day at work might make an employee pessimistic about their ability. Another employee might think the issue lies with the employer. The manifestation in golf tends to be like the former. Golfers engage in frequent negative talk towards themselves. To varying degrees, they will douse possibilities of improvement and success while raising the stock of their failure and perceived limitations.

Bob Rotella, the pioneer of sports psychology, repeated the adage that “golfers, by and large, become what they think of themselves.” No one improves by berating themselves; in fact, no one would hire a coach to berate them. Think back to a favorite teacher, coach, or mentor. I’m willing to bet none of them could be solely characterized as harsh. It’s not a mystery that unrelenting criticism does not strengthen a player’s confidence. Yet, it’s a common internal habit. More common than positivity. How many of us can honestly testify that when we address the ball, peering at our target, say internally “I got this”? Or “I’m hitting this in the middle”? How consistent are we in affirming ourselves, if at all?

Recently the European Tour recorded players hitting tee shots during a practice round with a special catch. From the outset of their routine to triggering their backswing, each player needed to say aloud what they were saying in their head. All of the thoughts were a simple swing idea, shot type, or target often complimented with a positive thought. One pro striped his shot exactly as called and stated “all four days” after savoring the ball’s perfect flight. The “all four days” refers to each day of the tournament — no negative bias there.

Between the best golfers in the world, you will be hard pressed to find one that does not have a forward-thinking mentality. That’s not to say they don’t deal with mental struggles. The difference is they do not allow the circumstances or results to change their mental approach.

The difference between pro and enthusiast in this regard is not surprising. But how does this thinking make a difference? With a positive view of ourselves, we begin to act more like that player. With an achievable outcome in mind, we will begin to concoct solutions to our challenges. We will be too occupied gazing upon the good to wallow in the negative.

Dr Jordan Peterson, a clinical psychologist and New York Times Bestseller, promotes similar counseling. His talks and interviews casually garner millions of views online. In a chapter of his most recent work, Beyond Order, he calls readers to “Aim at something. Pick the best target you can currently conceptualize. Stumble toward it. Notice your errors and misconceptions along the way, face them, and correct them.” Peterson’s focus is growth of character, but the point remains the same on a micro level like golf. You don’t need to aim at a professional’s level of performance, but you need to aim at something better than the status quo. You need to think of yourself better than you currently do. Peterson states it best saying, “Imagine who you could be, and aim single-mindedly at that.”

Those who dwell on their insufficiencies and consequences of failure will get exactly that. Dwelling on positive outcomes and abilities goes hand in hand with training for them. To improve your swing and still think negatively of yourself is counterproductive. Imagine a surgical intern practicing precise surgical techniques thinking “I will botch this operation so badly.” Anyone want that person as their doctor?

To clarify, this isn’t grounds for eternal optimism where you ignore or justify deficiencies. It just means you recognize yourself as someone who can play well, even if it means managing mistakes. Things will go wrong but we don’t have to let it change our outlook. To paraphrase Peterson, even if we fall short, at least we fall towards the ideal rather than proactively sprinting from it.

Seeing the glass half empty or half full both have merit. But when it comes to performance (especially competition) and wanting more joy out of the game, you’re better off viewing things half-full. The optimistic player stuck in a bunker will see the opportunity to pull off a shot. The pessimistic player will have already missed before even taking the swing. How can you possibly succeed when you have already failed in your mind?

So how do we combat the negative bias? There are a number of things we can do but I want to tackle two specific problems and their solutions.

First, we need to squash the misconception that our best golf equals perfect golf. Great rounds are full of mistakes and misses. During one of my summers, I played a round at a familiar course and shot a new personal best of 67. One of my unexpected observations was how uninspiring my game was. I didn’t feel like I did anything special. I hit the same number of fairways and greens as usual. I had one chip-in. Everything else felt normal, I actually had a couple of careless bogeys. Even a friend looked at the scorecard and said, “you bogeyed those holes!?”

It’s not the shot characteristics that seal success, but a frame of mind. One of my junior clients was thin and average in height. He didn’t hit the ball very far, but he was accurate. He mentioned how the kids on the junior tour were 20-plus yards ahead of him. I told him “Good, you can put the pressure on them by hitting it close first.” He smiled at that perspective, it matched his competitive nature, he liked it. He went on to win two junior titles, including one in a playoff.

One of the negative bias’s first lies is that perfection is necessary. That you need to pull off the amazing shots. That there shouldn’t be bad results. Do me a favor and watch this video. These are some of the worst tee shots from the best golfers in the world. You expect these from your regular foursome — not your fantasy foursome.

The idea that every category of your game must be superior is fallible. One of my favorite examples of this is Nick O’Hern.

Who?

Former PGA Tour pro from Australia.

Ohhhh…. still don’t know who that is.

I’d wager that less than 5% of golfers nowadays know who this guy is. Nick O’Hern was a southpaw swinger who never won on the PGA Tour despite ranking top 50 in the world over a handful of years. He was short off the tee and displayed a short game that would make a crowd go “wait, that’s not Phil Mickelson.” Compared to PGA Tour stars, O’Hern’s successful career was like that of a movie extra.

His calling card was putting. The long flatstick led him to a distinction no one else will ever have. He’s the only golfer to ever beat Tiger in match play multiple times. He did this when Tiger was at his peak. That’s right, head-to-head with the prime goat. He is solely responsible for derailing Tiger’s tournament win streak.

Image Credit: Australia Golf Digest

The common thread of these stories dispels the illusion of what it takes to play well. Regardless of what you’re faced with, it’s maintaining the disposition that you’re capable. As a college coach, I saw good rounds come in all forms. I saw guys hit less than 40% of their fairways and greens in regulation yet still shoot under par. The only way I did not see a good round is with bad putting. Great rounds don’t come from perfect golf and certainly not a self-deprecating monologue.

So how should we think to give ourselves the best chance going forward? Just as we feed our body food, so we feed our golf game thoughts. We observe and choose conclusions. We decipher swing mechanics and regulate emotions. We know if we eat poorly, our body will respond poorly. Well, when we choose to think poorly, our golf game will conform. Dr Jim Afremow brought a simple story to the table to solve this problem:

“There is an old Cherokee legend known as the tale of the two wolves. A grandfather explains to his warrior grandson that there are two wolves within each of us: One wolf is positive and beneficial, while the other wolf is negative and destructive. These wolves fight for control over us. The grandson is curious and asks, ‘Which wolf will win?’

The grandfather replies, ’The one you feed.”

Afremow cuts to the point with this old illustration. The burden is upon us to steer our performance through healthier thinking habits. We must catch ourselves when we are not feeding our mind constructive thoughts. We don’t need to patronize ourselves with exaggerated compliments. We should; however, cement the successes we create and remain believers in our capacity to achieve. Regardless of where the ball lies, we need to attack the next shot with enthusiasm or determination. Inwardly it can be a battle cry or stoic unwavering. It can even be a galvanizing swing thought. Whatever the personality, it needs to be constructive, striving towards the better version, aimed at success. Because the one who aims at nothing, will hit exactly that. The one who aims at what they want may not always get that, but they can get close. They can succeed some of the time. That can be enough to be better. But no one ever succeeded without first thinking of themselves in the light of success. How will you think of yourself?